Life is so frustrating sometimes. Sure, I am healthy, despite this nasty sinus infection I am battling currently, but otherwise I'm usually 100% most times. I'm 30 years old and struggling with this economy and horrible job market. I've got a college degree and find it near impossible to be able to find any employment beyond working in retail or slinging drinks. I can assure you I didn't go to college for five years and take on several thousands of dollars in student loans to keep waiting tables or fold clothes- not that there is anything wrong with that, it just can't afford my life.
I feel like people assume that I am an outrageous shopper and drop loads of money on clothes and shoes and that my mommy and daddy pay for everything for me simply because I'm an only child. I would love to know where people come up with their ridiculous assumptions. I am actually very smart with my money and spend wisely and rarely. I actually HATE spending $2 on a chicken biscuit at Chick-fil-a or $5 on a Starbucks and I might do that once every 3-4 months, IF that. I have such a tight grip on my money, it's not even funny.
Here lately I've made posts on Facebook regarding what is, in my opinion, expensive rent in Nashville. I'm not even sure why I bother posting anything like that sometimes because generally it only leads to criticism from people who claim to be "friends". Hell, what is the real definition of friend now anyway? Either that or I have these random suggestions to room with someone or just smartass comments that insult me like implying I should get a "rich boyfriend" or "sugar daddy" to fund my move. I think people often fail to realize that even though all they see is just a string of words on a computer screen that there is actually a real person with real feelings on the other side of another screen who typed them. Sometimes your words are very offensive and hurtful. I've decided to roughly outline for people WHY living alone in this economy is NOT affordable for me since no one seems to understand it when I simply state "I cannot afford that." If $1200 per month in rent is affordable for you, I congratulate you on either not having student loans, having a great job, or being really lucky having rich parents, or being married, thus having dual incomes to make it possible. I am single, I have student loans with insane interest rates, no thanks to our president, can't find a job or one that would pay enough for me to pay my rent and bills, and do not have rich parents.
The average salary I see being advertised for someone with my qualifications is usually around $27,000-$33,000. We'll say, for this example, that my rent would be $1000 (and that's not even realistic because most places I've seen are at least that much). So, let's say I am making $33,000 and bring home about $26,000 after taxes. I would have to automatically deduct $12,000 from the $26,000 for rent, leaving me $14,000 for the rest of my bills and expenses for the rest of the year. Whether or not I carry health insurance, I will pay a minimum of $2500 (the tax you incur for not having health insurance - I, however, DO carry health insurance and actually pay closer to $2800 per year). So let's take $2800 from the $14,000. Now I'm down to $11,200. Let's say for utilities, cable, and internet I pay $300, which is likely an overestimate, but at this point, what is a $50 difference? $300 over the course of a year will add up to be $3600. Now I'm down to $7600. I still have to eat, have gas, buy clothes, pay for car insurance, phone, and pay those pesky student loans, etc. I'm not going to even continue.
When you see that the price of gas is currently about $3.50/gallon and that something as ridiculous as drug store shampoo can cost $8.09 and that American cheese singles can cost $5.79, it is scary and frustrating knowing that as a single woman you literally cannot afford to live by yourself. And I don't have any single friends in Nashville or Florida that I can room with, so that's not an option. It bothers me a LOT that I even have to go through this. I look back now and wish I had either not gone to college and just had taken a receptionist job somewhere and worked my way up because I would likely be further in life than I am now having a college degree. Sometimes I wish I had just taken an extremely long time in college and worked my way through college and never taken out student loans because I might just now be graduating, but I'd be debt free. Did I mention that I have ZERO credit card debt? So what I pay currently is literally what I have to pay; it is not the result of overspending in college or after. This is why I post things saying "I wonder how people can afford to live". I know what my situation is and I know what a few others' situations are. And when you know other people who are in their late 30s and early 40s who either can't make it on their own or can barely get by, it makes you feel hopeless. Sure, I fire out resumes all the time to no avail. People talk bad about me because I chose to wait tables for so long- I made very decent money when I worked in that industry even though it wasn't the most ideal situation. Could I return to bartending or serving and probably do alright? Absolutely. But the problem there is the money is never guaranteed and there is no health insurance.
I don't fault anyone for their career choices just as no one should fault me for mine. I choose to openly discuss my frustrations, really just to get them out, and sometimes to see if someone may have a suggestion that may not have occurred to me. I enjoy the feedback, but not when it is rude, demeaning, insulting, or chauvinistic. I don't choose to have people verbally insult or attack me or make cruel comments just because they have access to do so. So please, have some more respect and understanding. You never know 100% what someone's situation is and it is not your business to judge.
